Boris Johnson has offended at least 61 countries. Here’s how he did it.
British politics reached a new level of farce when Theresa May appointed Boris Johnson as Foreign Secretary. Many expected him to receive a minor role such as Minister for Culture. Instead, May gave the role of UK ambassador to the man who spent the previous month dismantling the UK relationship with the EU.
Johnson is a professional buffoon and former London Mayor. He has managed to insult approximately one third of the world’s countries. This includes most global powers. His record of diplomatic incidents is extensive.
1. Russia
Boris Johnson on Vladimir Putin:
“Despite looking a bit like Dobby the House Elf, he is a ruthless and manipulative tyrant.”
2. Germany
Johnson said the EU was an attempt to recreate the aims of Hitler and Napoleon. He claimed they were trying to unify Europe by different methods.
3. France
Johnson implied his superiority over the Mayor of Bordeaux. The city had 239,517 people at the time.
“I got the ball back very firmly over the net, folks, because I said there were 250,000 French men and women in London and therefore I was the mayor of the sixth biggest French city on earth.”
4. Turkey
Johnson won a prize for a poem about a man from Ankara and a goat.
“There was a young fellow from Ankara, Who was a terrific wankerer. ‘Till he sowed his wild oats, With the help of a goat, But he didn’t even stop to thankera.”
5. Syria
Johnson shared his opinion on Assad reclaiming Palmyra.
“Hooray, I say. Bravo – and keep going. Yes, I know. Assad is a monster, a dictator. He barrel-bombs his own people. His jails are full of tortured opponents. He and his father ruled for generations by the application of terror and violence – and yet there are at least two reasons why any sane person should feel a sense of satisfaction at what Assad’s troops have accomplished.”
6. China
Johnson assumed China has zero cultural muscle despite being a world power.
“We do not need to fear the Chinese […] China will not dominate the globe. We do not need to teach babies Mandarin. […] Compared with the old British Empire, and the new American imperium, Chinese cultural influence is virtually nil, and unlikely to increase.”
7. Japan
Johnson tackled a 10-year-old child during a game of touch rugby. He followed the incident with a handshake.
8. USA
Johnson wrote critically about Barack Obama. He suggested the president held a grudge against Britain due to his Kenyan heritage. He has also insulted Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump.
So proud.
Got to be up for worst Foreign Minster in British modern history. Unless in our post factual world, insults don’t matter either
This government is controlled and run by second raters – not dedicated politicians – but proto fascists, chancers, carpetbaggers and nest featherers. What is the betting that those ‘negotiating’ our exit will have cleared off within the two year period for negotiation? When they realise they have to do some real work and will be subject to scrutiny they’ll be off on the US lecture circuit or pretending to do 5 jobs at once for £millions. The Opposition? What Opposition? Corbyn thinks he’s running the local branch of the Citizens Protest party (meet every Tuesday – free tea and biscuits supplied – Lenin hat optional) while anyone with any intelligence is either shunning being a Labour candidate or is clearing out as soon as they can get another job. Brexiteers? They have full confidence that that nIce Mr Davis and that new Britannia Mrs May ably supported by Boris and encouraged by that lovely Mr Farage will lead us to victory over those foul Europeans. Gawd help us one and all!!
This man is a total disgrace and has shown himself to be completely self serving. He will stab his friends in the back, metaphorically speaking, to get what he wants. He will also change his position, as he did on the referendum if he sees personal benefit in it.
I am ashamed that he represents this country abroad…..he may be intelligent but has no common sense and no diplomatic skills…
I don’t find Boris Johnson’s appeal at all surprising – he is the ventriloquists dummy for a certain kind of English person’s passive aggressive desire to tell Johnny Foreigner to shove orf without appearing rude themselves.
I want John Major back, I’m not even kidding, it’s not 1990s nostalgia, I want someone Moderate back who at least publicly thinks things through for a long time and then only tweaks things slightly if their not broken. Even The Guardians infamous cartoonist Steve Bell half joked that John Major was way more left wing then Tony Blair.
True. Come back John. Restore sanity to this country.
True. A genuine man of the people with previously unsuspected leadership qualities. Come back like Cincinnatus, sort this mess out, then retire to the Member’s Stand at the Oval taking the country’s gratitude with you.